Refusal

 When the news broke last Friday about the Connecticut tragedy I made a conscious decision to only read about the actual event and refused to watch any television coverage.

And then while Molly and I were walking along the Scioto Mile, it smacked us right in the face. A local news station hung this banner along with sharpies for residents to sign.

Of course Molly wanted to participate but she also wanted details. How do I tell this innocent 3 year old about the tragedy? I was vague and sugar coated - a lot but also let her sign her name.

So maybe when she's older - a lot older and reads about the events in Connecticut I can send to here to see that she, too, wanted to help.

Jump!

We were at a friend's (and if pre-arranged marriage was acceptable I'd be able to type family) birthday party and all the kids were jumping off the stage, well all except for the one year old birthday boy and my soon-to-be four year old. Grandmas held hands, friends cheered, other showed examples, & one special little boy offered to catch. 

You could see the struggle in Molly - she wanted to jump because the other kids were (did the clique if all the other kids jumped off the bridge would you? just run through your mind?) but man that floor was all of 2 feet away. She thought and thought and just when we were sure she was ready to let go she thought some more. And then the time came and she shimmied off the stage without any help - once.

It was super frustrating for me to watch her take so.much.time to process something that she should have freely enjoyed but as I'm typing this I hope she never loses that need to process as I believe it will make her a much safer teenager!

15

Tomorrow we are celebrating Alec's 15th birthday. Its rough being a parent of a teenager. They are moody, messy, grumpy, and mumbling fools but that's only part of the time, the other part you see the adults they are becoming and it was never as apparent as it was the other night.

Mike had bronchitis and pneumonia over Thanksgiving so I needed to get the extra mattress from Alec's room so I could attempt to stay healthy. I texted him to let him know that I was headed up to get it and by the time I got to his door he had the mattress out and carried it to the loft for me. As I was getting my things, he told me to just lay down and he'd get me some blankets and should I need anything through the night to just text him and he'd take care of me. He's going to be an amazing father and awesome husband some day!


Alec - I love you to the moon and back and more than all the stars in the sky. I love how much you love your little sister when most 15 year olds could care less about their siblings. I love your creative nature and am so excited to see where it takes you. I love that you eagerly step up to help when you see someone struggling. I love that you appreciate the little things in life and embrace nature when so many people are too caught up in the digital age. Alec, our family would not be complete without you and I thank God every day that he let me be a part of your life!

Thanks

There are always so many things to be thankful for not just on Thanksgiving but each and every day. However, this Thanksgiving we are MOST thankful that we were able to make such loving memories with our family.

Mother of the Year Award

I officially LOST the Mother of the Year race today!

While shoe shopping with Molly today, I encouraged her to measure her feet on the kid rug provided in the shoe section. When I observed, I couldn't believe my eyes! So we quickly starting trying to shoes on.....the 10s were snug and the 11s were perfect, they were on sale, Molly loved them and so we headed to check-out - Molly proudly holding her box of new kicks and me walking behind her with my head hung in shame. I told the lady who checked us out that we didn't need a bag as we would be putting these shoes on immediately. Especially since the shoes currently on my daughter's feet were N-I-N-E-S! Yes, 9s - two sizes smaller than the ones purchased.

Hopefully with appropriate shoes, Molly will have even more fun running around with her friends!

So Much to Learn

We participated in Celia's Walk to Defeat Batten's Disease today. Its always been a family event complete with snacks, friends, and a big open field to play in. Today's walk was different because its the first walk without Celia so we arrived with heavier hearts.

Many of the kids found themselves in the soccer goal during the walk. We took a couple pictures ~ say cheese, thumbs up, funny faces and one waving to Celia all the way up in heaven. While waving to Celia, her little brother, Tucker said through tear streaked cheeks that he missed his sister.

And that group of 2-6 year olds, sat silently with sadden hearts while their friend grieved, once again, the loss of his big sister. Then, with approval from the adults, they hopped up and wrapped their arms and love around their friend. Surrounded him in a group hug to help lessen his grief.

Mike and I often marvel in what Celia taught us in her brief life but her teaching didn't stop when her body did. Her lessons are alive and working through the many children who love her and her family. We still have so much to learn.

Bi-polar

 All parents at one time or another has shared an expression of relief that their child exhibits some sense of self-control in public. There are also those times at home during a melt-down or over drinks with friends where a parent wishes others saw how ridiculous said child acted in order to receive some sympathy. 

Miss Molly is the queen of being an angel in public and with those whose opinions she values most (her preschool teacher - Mrs. Morgan, her babysitter - Miss Lisa, and family friends - Miss Jenni & Miss Denae).

Luckily, I was armed and ready with the camera tonight so I have proof of Molly's dark side. If a pumpkin can elicit this type of response can you imagine what another human can?

Nature

 does a body (and soul) good.

Most parents understand the need to get away, hide, and sometimes utterly ignore your children when they've called for you for the 10th time in less than 2 minutes. Doesn't mean you don't love them more than anything in the world, it just means your human.

This weekend, with the help of the grandparents, Mike and I were able to steal a few days away from the kids, from the never ending kitchen remodel, from the laundry, and basically from life. Mike has spent most of his time standing in a river catching browns and salmon, while abandoning me at the bed and breakfast with no vehicle. I couldn't ask for any sweeter gesture from my husband. I've been able to walk with no specific destination and with no time schedule to the little canal town about a mile away. I've slept in, taken naps, read, and meandered through the weekend - I can't tell you the last time I meandered. I like meandering and would love to do again sometime SOON.

I'll be ready to pack up tomorrow to retrieve the kids. To hear my name tumble off their lips as they eagerly share their conquests with the grandparents. But not tonight. Tonight I'm looking forward to the third child-free dinner with husband and the long drive back home where I don't have to remind anyone to stay on their side of the backseat!

2 Years

 As I reflect on the two year anniversary of my dad's death, my heart keeps coming back to my kids.

When I received the text from Alec on Monday night asking if he could wear Grandpa Jack's suspenders to school for nerd day my immediate reaction was "No". What if something happens to them? What if they get ruined? I was blessed to be surrounded by some amazing friends who encouraged me to say "Yes". Yes to reviving the suspenders. Yes to giving them new purpose. Boy am I glad I listened because Dad would've loved this picture of his grandson.

When I find myself dwelling on all the things my daughter's missed with her grandpa, I remind myself that he gave her something in the short time they were together that is irreplaceable - compassion. And then tonight my daughter and her daddy got to spend a special night at preschool - a night just for preschoolers and their daddies. How perfect. Priceless, really.

I'll always be a daddy's girl. I'll forever thank him for teaching me to change a headlight, for encouraging me to get my Master's Degree, for my flashlight holding skills, for always having jumper cables in my car and knowing how to use them, and for making feel like the most special girl in the world.

Home

Mike and I often talk about the possibility of moving back home.

It would be easier; especially during close weeks when I only see my husband as a shadow from the bathroom light as he tip toes through his morning routine in an attempt not to wake me or as he quietly slips into bed well after bedtime.

But then we pause and realize this is home. This is our home.

I dream of a time when our kids will come visit with their children, we'll see the worries melt off their shoulders as they breathe deeply the comfort of home. This home. Their home.

And then I'm comforted because we are exactly where we are meant to be. Home.

Bright Side

After a particularly trying week these two always help us see the bright side of life.

Speechless

Sometimes a picture strikes me as something I want to blog about and sometimes an experience strikes me and I search for the right picture.

I've had this picture for a few days and the words continue to escape my grasp but maybe that's the way its supposed to be.

Their bond crosses earthly boundaries and will forever be something I'm both grateful for and envious of which leaves me unqualified to blog about this picture.....

It Happened, It Really Happened

I sent my baby to preschool but as she often reminds me, "I'm not a baby!"

I honestly think she was ready long before now but I wasn't. She has an unquenchable thirst to know, learn, discover that reminds me of my dad. She never looked back as she ventured down the hall and I hope she never loses her love of learning.

Education is not filling a pail but the lighting of a fire.  ~William Butler Yeats

He Ain't Heavy

Years ago when we told Alec he was getting a younger sibling, he was adamant about wanting a brother and who can blame him? Brothers are awesome!

When Mike called him and told him the baby was a girl, Alec wouldn't even finish the conversation.

But when he walked into that hospital room and laid eyes on Miss Molly, his heart melted - melted right into her tiny grasp to be held forever.

Even though she has a hold on his heart, its apparent he has a hold on hers too.

Age Limit

We don't have one and for that I'm thankful. Its as if all stereotypes and expectations are erased when these cousins get together as they work to achieve their main objective - FUN; and they do it effortlessly.

As they gather around/in/by the pond soaking in all the adventures it offers I observe how my children are shaped by these simple activities; not the stone skipping skills or the catfish catching techniques but the unconditional love for others, the ability to find commonalities where few should exist, and the courage to try new things.

The gifts that these cousins give each other are priceless - something that I, as a mother, can't give my children.

And for that, I'm eternally grateful.

Passing the Time

We demo'd our kitchen July 5th. Its still not done.

I want to scream at the top of my lungs but instead we're finding constructive ways to pass the time. Today we had friends over to play and to help decorate the nearly done kitchen.

A perfect distraction!

My Wish

 I wish that we had the time to celebrate the wonders of each day, everyday. 

 I wish my children never lost their smiles, that they never had to attend the funeral; especially one of a friend, and that they were always this carefree.

Since this is real life, I will continue to help them try to understand it as they continue to help me.

Jet Setting

Not really, more like bus setting. I shared a long weekend with two of my sisters, a niece, and my mom just to come back for two days to gather the kids to head to North Carolina for an extra long weekend.

As much as I love being at home, I'm thankful to have such exciting experiences and to share them with my family.

Under Construction

The heart of our home - the kitchen - is being demolished tonight for bigger, better, and prettier things to come. During the upheaval we will be in and out, staying here and there, and traveling to and fro so the blog will be put on hold. Once we are up and running again, we will be certain to post before and after pictures of this exciting project!

Bursting

Our modest house which is used to containing 4 of us, at most, is currently bursting at the seams with 10 people but when the occupants are family its more like overflowing with both love and laughter!

Inheritance

 Little girls usually imagine wearing their mother's wedding gown or sliding on her sparkly engagement diamond when she meets her prince charming. As they get older maybe its the Christmas China or the special silver in the red velvet lined box.

For years I've had my heart set on something of my mother's - her hamburger masher. Yes of all the things that fill her house I want the hamburger masher and based on today's activities I think Molly will be calling dibs on the hamburger masher should I ever get it from Grandma!

Fun in the Sun

 

 

Leonardo da Vinci said, "Water is the driving force of all nature." And for the Wendels its the driving force of all fun.