Becoming

I was shocked to see how long it had been since I posted! Where in the world have we been? Well we've been working, parenting, and chauffeuring - much like most. 

There are moments when I wish away the time, even though I know better. Moments where I think, "I can't wait for Alec to drive." or "I can't wait for Molly to be able to shower." I'd like to be able to say I catch myself and quickly change my train of thought but that doesn't always happen.

But the other night, I was talking to a friend who's house recently went into contract. She was talking about how this is the beginning of getting something her family's always wanted. While I understand the want of something bigger when you have small children, the realization came to me that in less that THREE years, we will be one less in our day to day living. Alec will be miles away making his dreams come true.

Alec talks about college and how much he hopes to work as a game warden or a park ranger. He talks about going to far away states that are more rural and desolate than Ohio (hard to believe that's possible as we enter the winter months). Excited to live through harsh winters in a virtually solitary life. While I can't imagine that life, I hope the life he chooses brings him as much happiness as he brings me.

There are times I feel slighted that I didn't get to witness his first steps and I don't have memories to share about his first words or his first day of school. And while those things are important, I get to share how I witness every day him becoming a man. I get to hear him talk about his future, help him make those dreams become a reality.

I think those privileges are just as good, if not better, than those years of firsts. And I pledge to do better at being in the moment instead of wishing it away.